Reading Is Not a Relaxing Hobby

A public service announcement for book lovers

People say reading is relaxing.

Readers know it’s emotional sabotage.

Fantasy readers spend their nights watching kingdoms fall like it’s a hobby.

Thriller readers convince themselves one more chapter won’t reveal the killer (it never does).

Horror readers read in the dark and then act shocked when every noise becomes a threat.

This is apparently “unwinding.”

Readers also suffer from chronic sleep optimism.

Just one chapter turns into two hours.
Two hours turns into shooting daggers at the clock like it’s your fault your eyebags have baggage.

Plot twists are treated like personal attacks.

Authors will write one sentence and a readers’ entire life will be ruined.

Fantasy destroys productivity.
Thrillers destroy trust.
Horror destroys the ability to walk into a dark room alone.

And somehow, readers keep coming back.

Finish a terrifying, heart-stopping, emotionally devastating book and they immediately think:

That was amazing. What’s next?

Reading is the only hobby where people willingly experience fear, heartbreak, and stress and call it self-care.

And no one is planning to stop.